A New Religion

So today, whilst preparing to foist off more alcohol upon the ever ignorant public, I started thinking about the concept of good and evil, in the paradigm of the Christian religion, of course, because they're so much fun to make fun of.

The idea of hell, of evil. I thought about the presupposition that this place necessarily be somewhere other than the place for good people. but then I thought, if God is omnipotent and omniscient, then he's also an evil mother fucker. Literally, in the case of the holy trinity, figuratively in this case.

So I started thinking about an afterlife where both the good and the evil are side by side. You know, kind of like Los Angeles. And then I had my great Revelation.

We're all dead.

Yes, you see, we're already in the afterlife, and there's both the good, the bad and the ugly...would that still be both? Mmmm, grammatical details.

Anyways, I figure you die, but then you cling to those past memories, the idea of how your life once was, and your mental state clouds your afterlife and creates this shithole you call your living life. But you're not live, you're dead.

We're all dead. (Yes, I've been reading about the Nac Mac Feegle, leave me alone.)

Now I must propagate this prophecy, and convince people to release their grasp on this mental hold of a previous existance. Die to be truly dead again!

Killed by Death.

This is my contribution to humanity. Decreasing the Overpopulated planet. Heh.

Now if I could just work twinkies into it.